Pride. One of the feelings that your eating disorder fakes when you follow its rules and instructions. Moreover, pride is one of the seven deadly sins, which gets a whole ironic new meaning in consideration of an eating disorder’s possible consequences.
In contrast to that, since you have struggled with yourself for such a long time, feeling proud of yourself, your actions, your achievements and your body seems like a totally new and unapproachable concept.
So how can you regain the genuine and healthy pride of yourself again?
Here are four concepts to consider:
Who Am I Without My ED?
While trying to find yourself outside of your eating disorder, you may find yourself more lost in who you are than ever. The fact that you were used to your ED taking over your thoughts and defining who you are and your worth can be an awfully hard wall to break through and then rebuild; it can be one of the scariest hurdles you have to face in life.
Do you need help figuring out who you are without your eating disorder? Come find out in the School of Recovery.
Will I Ever Be Normal?
When you are deep in the fight for freedom, it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. There are so many factors that go into recovery, and the constant anxiety about others judging or commenting on your path causes the risk of triggering old thinking patterns all over again.
Re-entering the world after choosing to recover is exhausting.
Many who suffered from a past characterized by an eating disorder (or mental illness in general) find it much more comfortable to run away from or numb out the taxing thoughts rather than fighting to create new pathways of thinking.
Find Your Inner Strength And Share Your Truth
I myself always felt especially insecure about my breasts, my bottom and my thighs, even for a long time after I “overcame” anorexia because they are cluttered with stretchmarks. The urge to keep my experiences a secret was omnipresent for several years so I hid my body. Again.
The stretchmarks were a shameful reminder of the weight I gained in a pretty short amount of time after I had started recovery. It was not until many years later that I started reconsidering my thoughts and came to the conclusion that they are something to be proud of. I did not want to run away from the fact that I am recovering from anorexia anymore.
Those marks tell my story! They are a part of the journey that made me who I am today, and the proof that I won the fight over my eating disorder.
The illness that dragged me down for much too long, and it has finally became a new source of power to me.
You’re A Fighter!
So what exactly do I want to tell you? Everyone has his or her own way to cope with difficult experiences! So listen to yourself and find your source of power to become aware of the fact how beautiful you and your mind are. Feel the strength you gained during the battle against the former ED infested mind to finally tell the world who you are!
Concentrate on your new mindset. Pay attention to all the things that were totally blacked out during the time your mind just turned around food. You will realize that you get to know your whole environment anew which leads to the fact that you may react more passionate about all the great and maybe not so great things happening around you.
The most important lesson you can learn is that the ability to lead a happy life is not as naturally given as many people tend to think, but you always have the choice to make a difference and to draw new strength even from the darkest of times.